The main problem with being a classic "Type A" (which, if you haven't figured out by now, I most definitely AM) is that life rarely follows a formula. And it's even more of a rarity that life will follow your plans 100% of the time. ...And if there's one thing we "Type A's" don't do well, it's budgeting in some breathing room for those inevitable curves in the road.
However, I would contend that some of the best things in my life came about because of a change in plans :) And the "Type A" in me will just have to put that thought on her list; learn it, own it, and love it.
Today has been a perfect example of the universe reminding me that I cannot plan everything out; and of God reminding me He's still in charge, and it's all good.
The day just started out with a delightful change of plans for me. It began at 4:45 am with a spectacular thunderstorm, and, consequently the delay of our group's planned 5 mile run. This meant that I was able to crawl back into bed and snuggle with Jon & the kitties for another 2 hours. Heaven.
And this evening my plans to cook a multi-step vegetarian feast took a detour when my friend Heather invited me to join her to make up for our missed morning miles. 5 hot, sweaty, exhausting miles later, (I promise to never sugar-coat running for you. It is wonderful, but some days are really hard) the last thing I wanted to do was crawl home and spend a couple hours in the kitchen. So, instead, I crawled home & ate a popsicle, took a nice long shower to wash off the 2 tons of sweat that had accumulated on my body (blech), and now I'm munching on a couple pieces of BBQ chicken pizza that Jon saved for me and spending some quality time with my favorite blogging buddy, Gracie. And this is just lovely. I am so proud that Heather and I persevered this evening in less-than-ideal running conditions. And while preparing an elaborate meal lifts my heart and brings me peace, tonight I think my soul was craving some time to just sit and be quiet.
And so I will oblige it.
I think often of the woman I want to be... and if I could sum it up in one word, it would be this: grace. I want to be the woman who exudes calm & comfort. The woman who is capable and un-flappable. A woman you just want to be with. And I know that in order to become this woman I need to let go. I need to dream and plan, but then step back and say, "I've given this my best, what will be will be."... And mean it. I need to step out from the shadow of my own expectations, so that I can rejoice in the beauty of reality.
I need to let go. Unclench my iron grip on lists and plans, and hold open my hands for the blessings to come.
I've always loved this quote, and it seems only appropriate that I share it with you tonight:
"Everything happens for a reason, people change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so you can appreciate them when they’re right, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can come together."
- Marilyn Monroe
Your Turn: What is something in your life that hasn't turned out exactly how you might have expected it... but in it's own right, much better than you could have dreamed?